DaughterObject | AbsencePoison | PresenceKiller | A Poem

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We lay in the consequences of your actions,

Blood red, tired to the bone, I sank out of myself,

Leaking, I stopped wishing to become an adult,

I just looked at the floor that held pieces of me

And smelled my tears dry, your body behind mine,

Are you done now, are you done now?

I thought you’d never end.

There was no time, no space, I stopped moving amongst the shards.

You accepted me like this, broken down, collecting bits

That you wanted, apart from my whole body.

Suddenly you felt alive again and I stopped speaking.

I had enough of you.

You imitated love, you mimicked affection, you terrified me,

Looking into me as if we shared a secret or too many,

As if I could remember, your poignant smile, the forbidden appetite,

Who are you, who were you, your eyes on me always felt insane,

I projected lovability onto your face in order to soothe my primordial fear.

Mann, Frau auf den Knien haltend” by Egon Schiele (1890-1918)

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