disobedience | poetry

you’re not letting go

it’s your own ghost

that holds you back

screaming still

in your ear

across your mind

nothing can be finished

because this room will always stay

the way you left it

on your terms

and you can’t change a thing

but you keep waiting

as if your mind could relive

and alter your actions

alter the ghosts in our heads

as if you could reverse all directions away from you

you lie in your own filth

that nobody sees

carnivorous ghosts

and there’s just too much pain that was caused

by your mouth

by your hands

by your body

that the only way to persist

is to resist and pretend

and turn the past on its head

and see things from an angle untrue

from an angle delusional

angle after angle after angle

in the rabbit hole

and you look at me from its depth

and cantankerous neon streams of warmongering colours

and I look back at you

holding myself in place

at all costs

I hold myself in place