I thought that my body couldn’t sustain grief
*
the immeasurable
*
grief is never what you anticipate it to be
*
grief forces you to leave a part of yourself behind
and look at someone new within you
who takes on your face, your body, your language
*
a part of you won’t move forward
a part of you whispers, I’ll stay here
and goes silent
*
never had I been more aware of my warmth
than when I held your dead hand in mine
*
I familiarised myself with every dead aspect of you
in thirty minutes
and I knew, irrevocably so, that that’s not all there is
that there are things in this very room that I simply cannot see
and you had become one of them