a fistful of poetry | a poem that took place

you will be my one-trick pony

you’ll do it for me

that’ll do

stay the same

don’t move

I’ve got my eyes on you

their voices infest the back of my head


you needed me on my fours

so that you could stand

and holler

look at me


I reflected your secret behaviour in public

because I thought it was normal

and I understood that

I was a child that had to be hidden away in the house


one trick

one trick

you’ll do that

you’ll do it for me


you mould and break me at the same time


I sit on your lap and

am taught that you’re a man


a g e l e s s


we’re all children inside


and you used that as a weapon


drinking yourself into self-oblivion

putting on a clean vest, virtuewall,

drowning what comes up for air

again and again and again

you can’t help it

you want me there

and I become a part of your destruction


your face, hunger, it won’t do

I eat and eat you away

but you’re still there



I had stopped using words

nobody wanted to hear them

I had stopped using my body

it became invisible to everyone

but you

the trench got deeper

I got smaller

your hands a cage above my head













“Portrait of Giulia Leonardi” by Ferdinand Hodler (1853–1918)

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