targetdaughter | misanthropecharm | a poem against vampires

you convinced the whole world

that you are a victim

and I raised my voice against a chorus


you distributed yourself


into every child

because you

y o u

wanted to stay alive


and I’d see your rot

on her face


and she’d become your ugliness

and you felt betrayed by your self-involved sense of beauty

and you turned your back on her

that’s not what you wanted

that’s not how you see yourself

that’s not how you want to be remembered


you brought a child into this world

and moulded her and moulded her

until she was no longer herself

and bore your signs

your mental illness

you made her yours

she never belonged to herself


you accumulated possessions

and I swallowed your emptiness


from your threatening body

into hands on my head that pushed me downwardly


under your roof

into cars and cars

and parking lots

and cathedral yards


I am your daughter in public

and you can’t stand it


you only know the things

that I’d never tell you

you know

because you put yourself in me

to admire yourself in the female form

but I see disappointment and self-revulsion on your face


one body played dead

the other exhausted itself

c o n c e i v e ( d ) me


you pressured my sexuality

into a slaughterhouse

and sold me in pieces

one by one by one

to the highest bidder

yours to possess

yours to give away

yours to deny and regulate

define and insulate

infiltrate annihilate


a woman who does not serve you

has no right to her sexuality


they served you all

you made it happen

sexualisation knows no blood


subtlety threat tiptoed

love language disobient

facechange eruption

withdrawal violence

and there he is

Photo by Yaroslav Shuraev on

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