girlhoodfragments | a poem

I studied men’s faces as a child

waited for the corners

the edges

to tell the truth

the monstrosity


underneath their skin

in their brains

electrifying the air

that I inhale


I sat there

watching you touch yourself

and thought

what are you teaching me?


can I unlearn

e v e r y t h i n g?


you put into my head


he moans into her

and despite her revulsion

she thinks you look just like my father


my sister looks at me

and I’m parentified

I have no shoes to fill

I have dirt on me

her rage grows

because I’m not the mother she expected


women are harsher judges amongst their own sex




he wanted me to use him

his words


and I thought

silver platter


served myself


yesyesyesb o d y


he reacted to the good little girl within

in adoration

thinking how can I put her to good use?

and she showed him that she could put him in his place

if she had to

in self-protection

and he thought

she was supposed to be ever-pleasant

no matter how badly I’d treat her

g e t

r i d

o f

h e r


careful, he’ll go too far


the older I got

the more you asked yourself

how do I get back at her?


he reads books

because it’ll hurt more

when he eventually burns them

Photo by Maria Orlova on

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s