girlhoodfragments | a poem

I studied men’s faces as a child

waited for the corners

the edges

to tell the truth

the monstrosity

twitching

underneath their skin

in their brains

electrifying the air

that I inhale

*

I sat there

watching you touch yourself

and thought

what are you teaching me?

*

can I unlearn

e v e r y t h i n g?

*

you put into my head

*

he moans into her

and despite her revulsion

she thinks you look just like my father

*

my sister looks at me

and I’m parentified

I have no shoes to fill

I have dirt on me

her rage grows

because I’m not the mother she expected

*

women are harsher judges amongst their own sex

*

daughterhaunter

*

he wanted me to use him

his words

*

and I thought

silver platter

*

served myself

*

yesyesyesb o d y

*

he reacted to the good little girl within

in adoration

thinking how can I put her to good use?

and she showed him that she could put him in his place

if she had to

in self-protection

and he thought

she was supposed to be ever-pleasant

no matter how badly I’d treat her

g e t

r i d

o f

h e r

*

careful, he’ll go too far

*

the older I got

the more you asked yourself

how do I get back at her?

*

he reads books

because it’ll hurt more

when he eventually burns them

Photo by Maria Orlova on Pexels.com

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