Everything You Are Is Still Here: A Poem

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The sun is shining. I’m sure you feel the heat too.

I didn’t sleep well. I wish you were still alive.

You’re in every room that I walk into.

Did you think it would be this way?

What went on in your head?

 

Your life belonged to you.

Not for us to keep, determine its outlines.

I still have your books beside me.

I can’t read them yet.

A month ago. I still heard your voice in June.

 

I’m moving on with you by my side.

I won’t let my brother disintegrate in the past.

In my body, in my mind, in my memory.

There you shall live pain-free, safely, amongst light and love.

There I’ll hold you, as closely as we need.

 

You weren’t born to disappear.

Your time hasn’t run out within me.

I wash my face with your products.

I have your soap bars in my closet.

My face smells like yours, smells like mine.

One moment amongst the many.

I’ve felt how life had deserted your body.

I will never forget how my hands felt on your forehead.

How my lips felt on your forehead.

How I carried the smell that wasn’t yours around me for days

And brought you back to life in my own head.

grayscale photo of footprints on sand
Photo by Adrien Olichon on Pexels.com

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