Have you ever been a good girl?
Have you felt guilty, repentant?
Hands running over my mouth,
Fingers through my hair, curse words,
From one ear to the next, the ringing
Sounds in my stomach, the heat, captured,
Resilient, persistent, up and down the whole
Body, within your grasp, stinging toxicity.
The fingers move around me like ropes,
Laces, enlarged, accumulated, thick, hair
Caught within the fabric, the textures of
Your self-loathing, of your emptiness,
Your shattered dreams that you never dreamed of,
Considered, evaluated, tossed to the side, of the road,
Crushed, without stopping, hit-and-run, blood on
Your scalp, painted my body with that blood,
With that frustration and disappointment,
The sick hope and envy you injected my skin with.
You and I, we moved violently towards and away
From each other, I had your face and turned it into
My own, I walked through the scaffold you erected
For me and burned it to the ground, I came out alive
And feel my own name resonate in my strong bones,
Across every single organ, I holler and rage and love
And set myself free on a daily basis, you made the universe
Your nemesis, I create myself anew and incorporate it in every part of my own body.