Zersetzung / Decomposition

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We almost tore each other apart.

We learned it, internalised it, the

Disappearance of the self, the eruption

Of everything animalistic, the screams

Bursting with words that go unheard,

The big storm blasting out of the gut.

 

We needed to survive. He put so much

Bile into us that we needed to release it.

Onto you, onto me, our skin, torn and burned.

I loathed myself, what my body could do

To another one, a body that I loved, what my hands

Could do, how fast I could run into someone,

How annihilating your eyes could look,

The tissue of your face bursting red and

Distorted, this was never meant to happen,

How could we let him enter our bodies like this?

 

I cried, I was so ashamed of my own depths, what

Nested there, out to get you, if you angered me,

You were the same, at each other’s throats, reliving

The same nightmares, he’s out to get us, he’s there,

The pain, the insanity, we need to survive, I need to

Protect myself, with my teeth, with every object I

Can find, I look at what we do to each other and it feels

Like a slow-roasting murder of everything good within

Us, the love he gradually robbed us of, because we loved

Each other so much until we fought each other, off, every

Single day, transforming into objects to be desecrated.

blue sand on white background
Photo by Karolina Grabowska on Pexels.com

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