I crafted my own world to get out of yours

Scroll down to content

When I was born you composed

A requiem for me.

You saw me as an empty vessel

To be filled with your bile and

Rotten dreams.

A blank page with nothingness underneath.

Voicelessness and erasure.

 

You pressed me into the shredded costumes of dolls.

Corset-mouthed, blue-cheeked, terror-hearted,

And told me the world had died of impossibilities

And I believed your adult mouth. Rocking my tombstone

In your arms, suppressing who I was so you could step into

Me. And you stomped the fields where flowers grew.

 

I thought that I was going to die,

Leaving no traces on the mattress,

Not even in your heart and memory,

Sleep would never protect me, my brain

Would act as eyes and ears and you thought

Your crimes were safe, that you found a secret passage,

My body became a landmap, arteries, skin, and you discarded pieces

Of me, fermented, across deadened surfaces, spellbound.

 

You carved your desires through the hair on my arms.

Awoke my body unnaturally and I never learned

What consent was. You cut out words from my vocabulary.

You tried to incapacitate me in every way possible.

Time haunted me, the darkness of the countdown,

The empty eyes through the crevice of the door, the

Peacefulness of my flesh and blood, how could

The lives under the same roof be so incredibly different?

 

You brought me into a world

Where nobody believed me,

Where I was on my own, as a child,

Nobody listened to me until it was faded

And buried in an invisible cemetery,

Too late, for you, maybe, not for me.

I built cathedrals for the life inside of me

That you thought you massacred.

Every time you touched me I would start to rebuild

My own ruins, my flooded skin, and sing hymns

To what I kept alive, what I healed and nurtured and

You disrupted and disarmed and decomposed.

woman stretching her right leg upward near her face
Photo by ARYANE VILARIM on Pexels.com

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: