Sitting Still: A Poem

It’s dark now, I feel like it has been like that

The whole day. Something I couldn’t get out of.

You, not being where you should be. You, not

Moving. You, not eating. You, unreachable, by

Plane, by car, on foot, I have to think about you,

So hard, so long, I won’t get you back, the way you

Should still be, alive, I sit here and my face feels heavy,

You should still be wearing your clothes and I

Shouldn’t bury my face in them, in their scent, looking

For you, aching, head to toe, every single bone in my body

Longs for you and your presence, I miss you, I miss you,

I miss you so much. Your death hurts too much.