In Memoriam: “Tomorrow Is Your Birthday”: A Poem

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Your twenty-fifth birthday, tomorrow.

It pains me still, it pains me already.

I will try to celebrate you, your life,

On that day, ahead of me, I will try to

See its light, not its tragedy. Your life

Must never be a loss, it has always been

A gift, I thought it would be everlasting,

From one day to the next, every single day,

With me, around me, you just never know.

 

I think about the love of your life, how you

Loved her still, how you would always love her.

I remember how my hands cleaned you,

Caressed you, took care of you, your skin,

A baby, how I held you, carried you, loved you

From the start, in my arms, my flesh and blood.

 

I think about all the presents you bought,

The presents in our mother’s trunk, the

Present you wished for, on your birthday,

The high chairs you ordered, they came before

Yesterday, I think about how you ran late that

Morning, how you brushed your teeth, how you

Had run out of perfume (all your bottles were empty),

The almonds in a glass, the opened oat milk,

The traces of your life in every corner, your scent

On the pillows, against my face, glue, my soul, glue.

 

Death came in a second. Death came in a thought.

In a heartbeat. You didn’t know that you wouldn’t sleep

In your bed again that night. You didn’t know that I

Would come, to you, when you lay under your blanket,

Cold, I held your hand in mine and I could feel the warmth

Arise again, from me to you, I never wanted you to feel

Cold, I came to you and I reclaimed a goodbye that I felt

Robbed of, a goodbye with love and tenderness, and

I greet you again, every single day, death will never disintegrate you

From my life, my body, my language, my heart and soul.

endless mountain terrain under overcast sunset sky
Photo by Todd Trapani on Pexels.com

 

One Reply to “In Memoriam: “Tomorrow Is Your Birthday”: A Poem”

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