Ashen Pirouette

I knew that I had to stop looking for you

Eventually, comprehend that you would

Never call me again in the same way and

Learn that you exist in every single little

Particle of my skin instead.


I stare at my open bedroom door and imagine

You walking in, smiling, your hesitant steps,

Your scent, coming closer to me and your voice

Reaches my memory again and I don’t want to let

It go, the familiarity and warmth it possesses.


I know that you are where you wanted to be,

That you contemplated over your escape route

For a long time, waiting, sleeping, wanting to

Disappear, disengage, and nobody could hold

You back. He reached out his hand to you in

Your dreams and you ran towards him and

Made a promise.


I’ve seen you across the wet grass and earth,

Sinking in, a blanket of ash, glistening, in my eyes,

I felt you dancing, freed, delirious, part-memory,

Partly present, ever-expanding, your blue eyes

Looking at my face, your skin, evaporated, burnt,

Fresh air, moving, and I recall the safety of your chest.

white flower on book
Photo by Sheep . on




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